Our precious baby is eleven months old today ...
and what they say is true: you really don’t know the kind of love you’re capable of until they place that squirmy, pink, squishy and in our case - screaming - bundle into your shaking arms.
Our daughter changed our whole world. No, that’s not it, she became our whole world.
From the moment I found out we were pregnant, to the day I woke up to realize I actually looked pregnant, to sharing the news with our families and friends, to sonograms and showers...each and every one of those moments felt monumental to me, someone who dreamed of becoming a mother my entire life. Throughout my pregnancy I documented everything. Tirelessly. I took pictures, updated friends, journaled and bought three of those ridiculously beautiful and equally expensive baby books - I was so sure that the moment Avery Marie arrived I would want to spend my days loving on her and my night's journaling every single experience so I would never, ever forget!
My friends and family kindly ...
(and probably mockingly, if we’re being honest) reminded me that I’d be adjusting to quite a bit. I might not have the time (read: energy!) I thought I would. They warned I would not be immune to that type of exhaustion saved specifically for new parents, which of course I couldn’t begin to imagine. Finally, they reminded me to be so present in every moment I could because it flies by. Time just seems to go warp speed the minute you become a parent. What’s up with that? Because turns out, everything they said...was true.
Those beautiful baby journals sit untouched in a corner of my home office, the spines barely broken. What about the nights I swore I’d spend documenting everything? Well…..we've spent them catching brief moments of sleep whenever we could, deliriously happy (and yes, exhausted), staring at each other with a combined disbelief of “Can you believe she’s ours?” and “Do we have any idea what we’re doing?”
So okay, I didn’t journal.
I didn’t catch every moment with perfect cursive or polaroids: instead, I caught them with my iPhone. I texted my own mother at all hours with frantic questions, I sent my mother-in-law the sweetest photos, I group texted my mommy group hilarious updates, I sent my family and friends an endless stream of photos and “Can you believe it?! Look at her!” Maybe they weren’t all major milestones, but they were the moments that once I held my daughter, I couldn’t imagine forgetting : the first glimmer of a smile that I just so happened to capture, the texts about the awfully badly timed diaper blowout during her first meeting with Santa, the giggles she rewards us with at bathtime, her wide-set eyes - my eyes - that gaze at us every morning, filled with total wonder and joy as she happily babbles in her crib.
That is why this Mother’s Day...
I created Keepster books FULL of those moments: the texts, the chats, the photos, the emojis: our story. Using all these messages, I now have four hardcover books sitting on our counter - ready to be given as the perfect gift. Our Keepster books are incredible modern day baby journals: one I plan to keep for myself, one for each set of our daughter’s doting grandparents, and one to keep just for her someday. I can’t wait until the day Avery gets to flip through the pages to see just how much we’ve loved every single moment of being her adoring parents.